Black and Brown Non-Technical ‘VP of Sales’ are Unicorns
I analyzed over 2000 VP of Sales Profiles on LinkedIn. I was trying to edit my lackluster LinkedIn Profile to look more like a VP of Sales profile. I always try to make data driven decisions.
Heuristics for Becoming a VP of Sales for Brown/Black People.
- Use the NamSor API to optimize for northern European names. I think I could change my name to Sven or David. Seems fitting right? North Indians in my community growing up had always westernized their names. In fact, I know a Punjabi speaking Balbir who goes by “Bob” in the phone book. Turns out, in Texas people would rather give you a loan as a Bob than a Balbir. Go figure…
- Photoshop your melanin out of the picture or opt-out of having a picture. Fiverr should do the trick, but my outsourcer is delayed at the moment.
- Get a stylist/personal shopper. Risk-mitigation. Don’t worry, there’s plenty of startup unicorns dreaming of matching you with a stylist.
- Be Intensely Uniquely Valuable: Get an advanced degree in something obscurely technical and be one of the only 50 to 100 people in your field in the world. Go into a massively under-researched area of exploration and be an expert. For example, superconducting astrophotonics.
- Found companies. If you found the company then everything will work out. You can just be the VP of Sales.
- Become Western. Get accent elocution lessons.
- Do well in school. Get an Ivy league degree.